


Fireside Thoughts

by BashfulTenrec



Category: The New Legends of Monkey (TV)
Genre: Companion Piece, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Inner Dialogue, Mythical Beings & Creatures, One Shot, Post-Season/Series 01, Tripkey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-09
Updated: 2019-10-09
Packaged: 2020-11-28 05:53:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20961545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BashfulTenrec/pseuds/BashfulTenrec
Summary: Some of Monkey's thoughts as he sits by the fire with Tripitaka at the lake.Companion piece to The Messenger.





	Fireside Thoughts

I don’t know how much you saw, but I saw the sky explode with fire and smoke where I’d left you. Did it scare you? Were you in awe? Were you even conscious to see it?

Did you think I would come for you?

What was going through your head when I saw you sitting against that tree staring off at nothing? Did you hear me calling for you? 

Could you even see me?

Could you tell how scared I was, seeing all that blood soaking into the ground? Could you tell I was begging it wasn’t yours? Could you tell how messed up I got when I learned it was? 

Were you in pain when that arrow nicked you? Did you know how bad it was? 

Could you tell how scared I was, seeing the fire that scorched the sky burning under your skin? Did you know it was there, burning, keeping you awake, keeping you alive? Could you feel it?

Could you even see it, like I saw it?

When you asked me if I wanted to know what the qilin said to you, I didn’t care. Not that I didn’t care, I do, just that if it had something to say to me it would’ve said it. The content didn’t matter; if you’re being visited by a celestial messenger you must be doing something right. That makes sense, right?

It didn’t honestly matter in the moment. You were alive.

Sandy and Pigsy were scared to touch you. Sandy said that since she hadn’t seen the qilin, it could burn her. Pigsy didn’t agree with that theory, but he didn’t dispute it either. Maybe he thought that he might put out the flames keeping you alive. I didn’t think of that. I’m sure you know, but I don’t think about a lot of things before I do them. But even if those flames burned me, I’d still hold you. You know that, right?

Can you believe I used to get annoyed with your resolve? Do you know it was because I knew it could easily outpace my own? You know that now it’s a part of your spirit that I admire the most, right?

But do you even know how exasperating you are when you dig your heels in? Don’t you know that I know you’re strong? Do you even know how strong you are? I know you could walk back; I just didn’t want you to. How could I tell you I was still scared the flames would go out and leave you to die?

Could you tell how much I wanted to carry you?

Did you mind it when I tried to joke around with you as we went back? Did it even help? Was it obvious that I missed your smile?

You know that if you’re ever sad you can come to me, right? I may not know the right thing to say, but you know I’ll always try, right?

Were the flames in the campfire calling to the flames burning through your veins, doing the work that your lack of blood could not? Could you even feel the fire as you practically sat in it?

Would you have even burned if you had?

Where did you go when you were so far away, staring so emptily off into space? Were you lost?

You know that if you were lost, I’d come find you, right?

When you reached for the rag to clean your blood off your face, did you know how much your hands were shaking? Why do you always insist on trying to do everything yourself, make yourself small? Why don’t you want help? Don’t you know you’re not an inconvenience? Do you think I help you only because I was supposed to? Out of obligation? Have you ever dared to hope that I want to?

You know that no one’s forcing me to help you out on your journey, right?

Would you let me help you?

You were so quiet when you asked why the qilin would ever want to speak to you. Don’t you know? Why does your mind try and find ways to make you think you’re unworthy? Why don’t you see what I see?

Do you know how much we all care about you? You know how much I care about you, right?

When you asked me a favor, did you know I’d say yes before knowing what it was? You know you can ask me anything, right? You know there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, right?

Do you even know how much power you really have over me? 

Do you think I’ll ever be able to tell you all of this? 

Do you know just how much I… love you…?


End file.
